If you throw a peach to me, I will return a plum to you.

投我以桃,报之以李。

Background

This famous saying originates from "Yi" in the Greater Odes section of The Book of Songs. The original text reads: "If you throw a peach to me, I will return a plum to you. That child with horns, truly confuses the young one." This was a verse used by Zhou dynasty nobility during banqueting occasions to express the principle of reciprocity and mutual courtesy. In ancient society, both peaches and plums were precious fruits symbolizing beautiful friendship and valuable gifts. The poet uses the imagery of mutual fruit-giving to express the moral concept that in human relationships, there should be reciprocity and mutual return of kindness.

Interpretation

"If you throw a peach to me, I will return a plum to you" embodies the traditional Chinese virtue of reciprocity. The core meaning is that when others give us help, kindness, or goodwill, we should be grateful and return the same or even greater sincerity and kindness. "Peach" and "plum" here are not just specific fruits but symbolize human relationships, goodwill, and kindness. This saying emphasizes the principle of mutual benefit in human relationships, advocating the virtue of repaying kindness with kindness and opposing ingratitude and betrayal.

Historical & Cultural Background

Historical Context

This saying originated during the Western Zhou period (approximately 1046 BCE - 771 BCE), when China's feudal ritual culture was taking shape. The Zhou dynasty established a complete ritual and music system, emphasizing the central role of "li" (ritual propriety) in social life. As the most important cultural classic of the Zhou dynasty, The Book of Songs carried the important function of spreading ritual and musical education. Against this historical background, the aristocratic class maintained social relationships through ritual activities like banqueting and gift-giving, with "returning a plum for a peach" being a vivid embodiment of this ritual culture. Although society was strictly hierarchical, the principle of reciprocity became an important bond transcending class boundaries, reflecting the Zhou dynasty's political philosophy of "matching heaven with virtue."

Cultural Significance

"If you throw a peach to me, I will return a plum to you" has profound influence in Chinese culture. It is not only a classic expression of the reciprocity principle but also an important symbol of traditional Chinese virtues. This saying is deeply rooted in the collective consciousness of Chinese people and has become an important standard for evaluating human relationships. In traditional Chinese culture, it embodies the "propriety" and "righteousness" among the five constant virtues of "benevolence, righteousness, propriety, wisdom, and trustworthiness," emphasizing that people should maintain appropriate distance and mutual respect. This cultural concept has influenced Chinese social interaction patterns for thousands of years, forming a unique "human relationship" culture that continues to play an important role in Chinese society today.

Multi-Dimensional Analysis

Philosophical Analysis

From a philosophical perspective, "If you throw a peach to me, I will return a plum to you" embodies both Confucian "principle of reciprocity" and Daoist "cyclical concept of heavenly way." Confucianism holds that human relationships should follow the golden rule of "what you do not wish for yourself, do not impose on others," and "returning a plum for a peach" is the positive embodiment of this rule - "what you wish for yourself, also give to others." From an ethical standpoint, this saying reflects the moral principle of "reciprocal altruism," suggesting that good deeds should be rewarded to create a virtuous cycle. From an ontological perspective, it reflects the Chinese understanding of relational ontology, believing that human existence is essentially relational, with individual value being realized within relationships. From an epistemological viewpoint, this saying embodies the Chinese "empathic" way of thinking, emphasizing the establishment and maintenance of human relationships through emotional resonance.

Modern Application

In modern society, the principle of "If you throw a peach to me, I will return a plum to you" continues to have important guiding significance in business cooperation, international relations, and interpersonal communication. In the business field, it embodies the principle of mutual benefit and win-win cooperation between enterprises, such as strategic partnerships and technology sharing. In international relations, it guides equal and mutually beneficial diplomacy between nations, such as the principle of extensive consultation, joint contribution, and shared benefits in the Belt and Road Initiative. In interpersonal communication, it reminds people to establish healthy relationships, avoiding one-sided taking or giving. In the digital age, this principle has extended to online social interactions, where actions like liking and sharing posts reflect this spirit. Modern psychological research also confirms that reciprocal behavior helps build trust, promote cooperation, and is an important factor in maintaining social stability.

Origin Story

According to legend, during the Western Zhou period, the Duke of Zhou established rituals and created music, forming a complete ceremonial system. Once, King Cheng of Zhou hosted a banquet for the feudal lords at the palace, during which a lord presented precious peaches as gifts. King Cheng was deeply moved and immediately ordered fine plums to be brought as return gifts. The court historian was deeply touched by this scene and recorded it in The Book of Songs, using "If you throw a peach to me, I will return a plum to you" to praise this virtue. Since then, this allusion has been passed down as a classic example of reciprocity. Another legend tells of an ancient virtuous ruler who would always return plums whenever his subjects presented peaches, expressing the ruler's care and reciprocation for his people, embodying the people-oriented thought of "the people are most important, the state comes second, and the ruler is least."

Historical Impact

"If you throw a peach to me, I will return a plum to you" has had profound historical impact in China. Since the Han dynasty, this saying has been widely applied in politics, diplomacy, commerce, and other fields as an important principle for handling human relationships. During the Tang dynasty, poets like Li Bai and Du Fu referenced this phrase multiple times in their poems, further expanding its literary influence. After the Song dynasty, this saying entered enlightenment reading materials and became a moral maxim that children must learn. During the Ming and Qing dynasties, this phrase was carved into ancestral halls and academies, becoming an important part of family traditions and precepts. In modern times, this saying continues to be widely quoted, with Premier Zhou Enlai having cited it multiple times in diplomatic occasions to express China's principle of friendly foreign relations. Today, this phrase has become an important symbol of Chinese culture and frequently appears in international cultural exchanges.

Practical Guidance

To apply the wisdom of "If you throw a peach to me, I will return a plum to you" in modern life, consider these practical approaches: 1. In the workplace, when colleagues offer help, express gratitude promptly and reciprocate appropriately by sharing resources, providing information, or offering support. 2. In customer relationship management, go beyond simple buyer-seller relationships to establish emotional connections, such as remembering important dates for customers and providing service that exceeds expectations. 3. In friendships, avoid taking advantage mentality and ensure mutual exchange - if a friend treats you to dinner, take the initiative to reciprocate next time. 4. In neighborhood relationships, after accepting neighbors' kindness, take the initiative to reciprocate, such as returning homemade treats when receiving fruit from neighbors. 5. In online social interactions, respond to others' likes and comments to create positive interactions. The key is sincerity - don't calculate gains and losses, but rather reciprocate from genuine gratitude and goodwill.

Quote Information

Author

Anonymous

Source

The Book of Songs - Greater Odes - Yi

Category

Friendship

Date Added

9/11/2025

About the Author

Anonymous

Unknown Dynasty

Anonymous was a renowned Chinese poet and writer. Anonymous made significant contributions to Chinese literature and culture.

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